One Night Stand
by The Guy Below Me Sucks
Summary: One-shot. Shizuo invites Izaya over to his apartment for a drink because he's curious as to how he acts when the Flea is drunk. Of course, this leads to something accidental in the end...Rated M for language and implications of sex.


**Disclaimer: I do not own Durarara! If I did, Izaya would be Shizuo's "pet" and make hot, steamy love each night!**

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><p>Was it ever his intention to get himself into this little situation?<p>

Not originally, but somehow that "Neanderthal" that is Shizuo brought Izaya into it all. How did he manage so?

That's the only question that remains unanswered.

"…And I am here because…?"

The husky blonde haired man snorted. "Because I'm tired of drinking alone and I always wondered what it was like to see you drunk off of your ass."

"Well," the Informant started. "…I normally never get drunk. And I haven't planned to lately. So, if you don't mind, I'll be on my way out…"

As the black haired Informant started to make his way out of the debt collector's apartment, the said debt collector grabbed Izaya's arm and pulled him back. "I don't think so, flea. You're staying here, and that's final."

The famous Informant, known as Izaya Orihara, let out a long sigh. "Shizu-chan~ Are you really looking forward to my presence? Because…"

"Tch." The blonde shook his head, glaring the red eyed man down. "Not really. But I don't have anyone else to drink with. Today happens to be my day off and no one else is free, except for you." Shizuo Heiwajima, the Monster of Ikebukuro, paused. "And, even though I hate your guts, I have decided to just let this night be a little 'different' and drink with you for a change."

Izaya giggled. "You, my Neanderthal friend, are weird."

"Says you." The blonde spit out venomously and pulled out two shot glasses. "You're drinking what I give you, so no complaining." Shizuo filled both glasses with a Rum unknown to Izaya, and smirked as he gave one of the said glasses to Izaya. "May be some strong stuff for a pussy like you, but I guess we'll just have to see."

Izaya put his nose to the brown, thick liquid and twisted his nose. "Doesn't smell too good. With my luck, I'll end up getting drunk off of this one shot and pray to God that nothing happens that I'll regret tomorrow." Izaya shrugged and brought the glass up to his mouth, taking a little sip. He shut his eyes and shook his head, putting down the drink. He ran to the kitchen to fill a glass up with water and gulped it down. "How.." he started to say after catching his breath. Shizuo laughed as he downed his glass of liquor. "…in the hell can you drink that?"

As the blonde haired man filled up his shot glass a second time, he snickered. "I drink this practically every day, so it's normal that I grow a little 'immune' to it. As for you…I give you two glasses and you'll be drunk in no time. It's too bad that I'll have to deal with you." Shizuo plopped down on his couch and turned on his TV. "Hey, flea," He called to the Informant who was still getting the awkward taste out of his mouth. "grab your drink and get over here. You can't expect me to sit here all by myself while you pussy out in my kitchen, do you?" He answered his own question. "I don't think so. So get your ass over here and watch some TV with me."

A sigh sounded from the kitchen. The sound of glass being clanked together sounded throughout the room. Izaya plopped down on a recliner and set his glass water on the end table next to him. He reluctantly took another sip from his glass of alcohol.

Shizuo watched Izaya intently. With a befuddled look on his face, he asked the flea, "You do realize that that is a shot glass?"

Izaya looked dumbfounded. "Yes…?"

The blonde haired man let out a low growl. "_Shot_. _Glass_. Do you even know what you do with a shot glass?"

"Yes…?" He repeated.

"You aren't supposed to take occasional sips from it. You're supposed to drink it all in one _shot._ Get it?"

Izaya wrinkled his nose. "This stuff is too repulsive to even _attempt_ to drink it all in one shot."

"Pussy." The other retorted. The Informant darted his eyes to Shizuo.

"You want me to drink with you, so I would suggest you keep your insulting comments to yourself, _Shizu-chan._" Izaya emphasized on the "Shizu-chan". Shizuo's head shot over in the Informant's direction.

"You know, why did I even bother?"

"Because you're an idiot."

"…"

Shizuo couldn't argue with that one. He had already declared himself an "idiot" several years ago.

It's too bad he couldn't come up with something to say back to that damn flea. He just dismissed it away with the wave of his hand and poured himself a third glass. Izaya watched with amazement at the blonde's power to hold back his tongue and not say a smartass remark back towards him. _Probably the alcohol doing its job…_ He thought. _I'm getting a little lit here myself and I haven't even finished my drink, let alone get half way through it…It's so fucking repulsive…_

Izaya took another drink of the mysterious alcohol.

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><p>The smell of alcohol drifted around the room. Izaya looked around with hazy eyes. How many drinks has he had? <em>I don't remember…<em>

How long has he been here? _Not sure, but it had to have been at least 3 hours, right…?_

How drunk is he? _Pretty drunk, I imagine…_

What is Shizuo even doing? _Putting sloppy kisses all over my body…_

Wait, what? Say that again?

Izaya was too drunk to even push the drunk blonde away. He just sat there and soaked all of the pleasure that the drunken Shizuo was putting upon the Informant's body.

"Why are you so fucking _hot_?" He slurred into Izaya's ear. Izaya shrugged. He hugged Shizuo closer to him, suckling on Shizuo's exposed neck. He nibbled, earning a low growl from Shizuo.

Sweat drenched them both. Lust filled the air. Tonight, screams of pleasure will soar throughout the room, possibly waking up every neighbor in the apartment. Complaints and whatnot will be spewed back and forth. But Shizuo and Izaya could really care less. They were expressing their "love" in its most ultimate form.

Nevertheless, they regretted it the next day.

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><p>"…WHAT THE <em>FUCK <em>ARE YOU DOING IN MY BED?"

The husky man's voice boomed throughout the apartment. His face was beet red, his breathing intense. He had grabbed his nightstand, everything on it tumbling to the floor in a messy fashion, and raised it high above his head. Izaya cowered a bit, hiding his face behind his pale hands.

"Shizu-chan~. Please tell me that you remember everything that happened last night?" The Flea had a cheesy smile on his face. The husky blonde was taken aback.

"O-of course I do! Why wouldn't I? I mean…how _else _would you have gotten into my bed?" The nightstand was lowered a bit.

Izaya shook his head. "Well, so you say…"

"…Tell me! Tell me what happened! I can't think of any other way you would be in my bed and I already know that I never fucked you! I would _never _fuck you, regardless if I was drunk or not!" Shizuo pleaded and pleaded. Izaya let out a little snicker.

"…Says the one who came onto me last night…" Izaya muttered under his breath and shook his forefinger. "Tsk tsk, Shizu-Chan~. You should really let down on your drinking~!"

"WHO THE FUCK ARE YOU, SAYING SHIT LIKE THAT?"

Outside of the apartment room, the sound of a bulky object smashing against a wall could be heard.

Down the bustling roads of Ikebukuro, a skinny, pale, black-haired Info-Broker could be seen running away with a smug look on his face.

Further down the road, a loud grunt could be heard.

"YOU'RE FUCKING DEAD, YOU DAMN FLEA!"

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><p><strong>Author's Note: A one-shot! I actually debated on whether to finish this or not. I started running out of ideas for this story about half way through. But I sat down and just thought about it seriously until I thought up the next half! I happen to be proud of this as well, but Infinite Silence and No Annoyance happens to be my most popular fanfic so far and I was so proud of that one the best!<strong>

**I was actually going to write a lemon for this but I couldn't. I'm not too experienced writing things like that because I end up ruining the story. I'm lucky I got through that certain part in the story without screwing the whole story up. o u o Hurray for perseverance! **

**I noticed that I have been posting a story each day. o.o I plan on slowing that down here soon. What I have now should really be good enough. I need to finish other stories so I can make sure that I have enough to publish to keep a steady flow going on~**

**I also plan on writing an actual story here soon. Whether it will go like I want it to, we will never know. But I guess you will see soon enough here!**


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